


3K Words of Greed Riveted by Bubblewrap (ASMR)

by Turbulent_Muse



Series: Roommates Meme [3]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Bubblewrap, Christmas, Consensual Possession, Gen, Not actually ASMR, Roommate AU Christmas Special!, Sharing a Body, roommate au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:41:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21841612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Turbulent_Muse/pseuds/Turbulent_Muse
Summary: Magpiedragon said they'd read this so here it is, the Roommates Meme Christmas Special: Just Greed messing around with bubblewrap.
Relationships: Edward Elric & Greed, Greed & Lan Fan, Greed & Lan Fan & Ling Yao, Greed & Ling Yao
Series: Roommates Meme [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1348165
Comments: 26
Kudos: 85





	3K Words of Greed Riveted by Bubblewrap (ASMR)

**Author's Note:**

> I am SO glad to be posting in this 'verse again you guys! Here's my little Christmas present to all the fans of my Roommates Meme series, AND you can expect some scenes from the ending's promised roadtrip coming up in the new year!

It started with the new lamp. Ling had brought a lot of the furniture from his room to the house, so after the fire there was a lot he needed to replace. The first replacement furniture to arrive was a lamp.

It arrived wrapped in bubblewrap. As Ling began unwrapping the lamp he popped some of the bubbles. Then, suddenly, Lan Fan saw him sit down at the table and start popping more of the bubbles with an enraptured look on his face.

“Ling?” She asked.

“Why is this so satisfying?” Greed responded. He continued popping.

“Ugh. I can’t believe Ling is letting you waste time like this.” Lan Fan said with disgust as she walked out of the room. Things were still…tense between Ling’s family and Greed, but since they moved back into Ling’s home things had no longer been openly hostile, so the general attitude was at least moving in the right direction.

Greed ran his fingers over an unpopped buble, squeezing it slightly to feel the pressure as the air inside pushed back. Then he squeezed more forcefully, breaking the thin plastic and bringing his fingers together with an immensely satisfying “pop”.

“I don’t get it kid, what is it about this stuff that makes it so addicting?”

_“I don’t know, but everybody likes it.”_

“Hmm.” Greed responded as he popped more bubbles. Pretty soon he had finished the entire sheet and sat bored and despondent at the coffee table staring at the now useless piece of plastic.

_“Wow. I’ve never seen someone get every bubble so methodically.”_

“I want more.” He practically whined.

_“Yes, I know you do.”_ Said Ling, who by now was used to this sort of thing. _“But for now let’s finish putting together my lamp.”_

“Alright.” Greed grumbled. But before he could start putting the few pieces together Lan Fan entered the room again. She took a critical look at them before speaking, she had gotten good at telling who was in charge by sight.

“Greed. It’s dinnertime. You’re done.”

Greed sighed. “Yeah yeah, okay.” There was a rule, established by Fu, that Ling always got to be in control when they all had dinner together, even though other mealtimes were usually Greed’s time. Greed didn’t actually mind this too much, but he was annoyed by Lan Fan’s tone.

He let Ling take the wheel and spent the rest of the evening sulking. But the next day another package arrived and Greed could once again engage in his new favorite pastime.

……

“You’re acting like a toddler, you know.” Lan Fan said while watching him, intrigued by his focus. He didn’t respond, just kept popping, stopping only to turn on a podcast at Ling’s insistence so he wouldn’t get too bored. It was a trick they’d worked out for whenever one of them was doing something the other had no interest in. It was mostly implemented when Ling was doing homework.

It continued like that for awhile with more packages arriving every few days and bringing with them more tools of distraction for Greed. It wasn’t unusual for the demon to get caught up in new sensory experiences, but this obsession was lasting longer than usual. Eventually  
Greed was banished from the livingroom and sent to Ling’s bedroom because Lan Fan and Fu were being driven crazy by the sound.

“Seriously, do you have even an ounce of self-control?” Lan Fan questioned as grabbed the sheet of bubblewrap and ripped it from his hands.

Greed made a noise of protest and stood up from the couch to retrieve the subject of his undivided attention. “I do what I want.” He replied petulantly and popped another bubble. As he did he smiled, and it was such an innocent and joyous smile that for just a second Lan Fan forgot to be annoyed with him.

……

In the dream, the bastard was surrounded by fire. He loomed over them, taller than he had been in the waking world, and suddenly the fire rushed forward and they scrambled back, further and further away, until they fell backwards over the edge of something.

They fell for a long time through a cloud of smoke. The sound of different voices screaming surrounded them. Eventually they landed back in the woods, in the small clearing where their battle against Wrath had taken place. Their first instinct was to hide in case Wrath was there, but then they saw the bodies. Lan Fan and Fu, Ed and Al, and a fifth body facing away from them. Each one had a sword pinning them to the ground.

They had a sinking feeling in their stomach as some invisible force pulled them towards the fifth body. When they got to it they kneeled down next to it. They grabbed the sword by the handle and ripped it out of the body, and it fell onto its back. Then they could see, very clearly, that the body was their own.

Greed awoke on the verge of screaming. He sat up in bed and pulled his knees to his chest. He began to breathe deeply and deliberately, trying to keep himself from hyperventilating.

“Was that one yours or mine?” He asked quietly after a few minutes.

_“I don’t know. I don’t know if there’s any difference anymore.”_

“Yeah. I don’t know either.” The darkness made it all too easy to see the dead faces of their friends and family from the dream so Greed turned on the lamp and checked the time. It was five am.

Greed flopped back down on the bed and sighed. But he had no intention of falling back asleep, every time he closed his eyes the dream began replaying in his mind.

“Damn, I need something to do to get this out of my head.”

Ling thought for a minute. He used to comfort himself after a nightmare by listening to music, but for some reason that didn’t work for Greed. Like he’d said, he needed something he could actually _do_ to calm his mind. Then Ling had an idea. He took control, got out of bed, and went to the garage to get his bike.

……

Ever since becoming possessed, Ling found that he could ride his bike for much longer distances than before, distances that he should have needed a car to traverse. It was how he was able to commute to school from his home when he hadn’t been able to before.

So it was easy for him to pedal his way to the nearest Container Store. They weren’t open yet but there was a light on, an employee was there. So breaking in was out, this would have to involve charisma and finesse.

“Greed, leave this to me, alright?” Ling said as he got off his bike and leaned it against the wall.

_“If you say so.”_

Ling put on the sunglasses he wore whenever he was in public and went up to the glass automatic doors that led into the store. He knocked on them forcefully until the employee came over.

“We’re closed.” They said, sounding bored.

“I know,” Ling replied, trying to sound as reasonable as he could. “But I need some bubblewrap right now, it’s an emergency.”

“A bubblewrap emergency?” They deadpanned.

“Yes.” Ling said sincerely.

“Get out of here before I call the police.” They replied, sounding a bit uneasy.

Ling sighed. He took off his sunglasses, looked the employee in the eye, and enunciated in a way that showed off his sharp teeth. “I _need_ some bubblewrap.” He said as menacingly as he could. The employee looked shaken. Then he switched to smiling and being polite. “Look, I’ll pay for it, and I’m really sorry to bother you, but I need some _right now_.” He switched back to a serious expression for those last two words and his next ones. “And I _am_ going to get it.”

The employee looked confused and conflicted, probably trying to decide what the safest course of action was. Ling remained silent and let them deliberate. “… Okay. How much and what size?”

……

_“I keep forgetting you can get all scary like that.”_ Greed said as they pedalled back home. _“It’s unsettling.”_

“So I’m intimidating enough to scare a demon?” Ling teased.

_“I never said scared!”_ Greed defended. Ling laughed as he opened the garage.

Once he got inside the house he was confronted by Lan Fan. “Where have you been and what business do you have being so loud this early in the morning?” She asked groggily. Then she saw the small roll of bubblewrap in his hand. “Oh you have _got_ to be kidding me.” She started, but her face softened when she met his eyes and saw that it was Ling she was talking to. “I’m sorry. I just don’t understand why you indulge him so much. It makes me angry to think that you are doing things for him instead of doing them for you.”

“Lan Fan…yes I do things for him a lot, but he does things for my sake too. That’s the only way _this_ works.”

Lan Fan sighed. “Okay, I know. I just…Why are you even awake right now?”

“We, uh, we had a nightmare. I thought that this,” he held up the bubblewrap. “Would help Greed put it out of his mind. That maybe it’d help us _both_ do that.”

Lan Fan looked at him for a moment, then she walked over to him and gave him a hug. He hugged her back immediately, glad for some tactile proof that she was alive.

“You don’t deserve the things that have happened to you… either of you.” She said sadly.

“Yeah, but who does?” Ling replied, very aware that she only had one arm with which to hug him.

……

Once Greed realized that bubblewrap could be bought he started insisting on buying large quantities of it in several different sizes. It got to the point where they always had some bubblewrap with them so Greed could pop it if he was feeling stressed or upset or just bored. To Greed’s credit, though, he never touched the bubblewrap during any of Ling’s classes, probably mostly because he knew if he did it’d probably be taken away.

Besides, Ling had been surprised to find that during his classes Greed tended to pay just as much attention as he did. He’d assumed that the demon would be bored during his academic activities, but Greed’s support of Ling’s life plan, or at least the parts of it that would lead to being rich and powerful, translated into focus during their studies.

Still, the bubblewrap often made an appearance during their lunch break, and it did not go unnoticed.

“Jeez,” Ed said as he sat down next to them. “How long has it been, three weeks? I’ll admit that bubblewrap is pretty addictive, but usually sensory stuff only holds your attention for a few days.”

“It’s just…something to do. Something fun enough to keep me from getting bored when I don’t have anything I need to be thinking about.” Greed responded with a shrug.

“Well, for now you can stop focussing on that and actually talk to me.”

“Yeah yeah, I was planning to.” Greed said as he carefully placed the bubblewrap back in Ling’s backpack.

……

“Lan Fan! Can you come over here?” Ling called out from his room.

“Why?”

“I need help winning an argument with Greed.” He answered as she walked in the door. That got her attention, as far as she could tell Greed and Ling hardly ever argued and even when they did, Ling, who was much better than anyone else in the house at conflict resolution, could usually handle things himself. She was about to ask what the argument was about when she saw Ling’s bed. On top of it were many, _many_ sheets of popped bubblewrap. “He won’t throw away his trash.”

Lan Fan sighed. “This conversation _again_?”

“It’s not trash.” Greed mumbled.

“In what way is this not trash?” Lan Fan said, frustrated.

“Because… Because I want to keep it.”

Lan Fan put her head in her hands.

“Look,” Ling reasoned. “It’s like we talked about with the fortune-cookie fortunes and the Dove chocolate wrappers. It’s an experience, like food, not something you get to keep.”

“But…” Greed said. Lan Fan didn’t think she’d ever get used to them switching that fast . But now, looking at Greed’s face, she saw a sadness that moved her from annoyance to pity.

“Look, do you know which of these was your first sheet of bubblewrap?”

“Yeah,” Greed reached with certainty into the pile and pulled out a sheet that, to Lan Fan, looked just like all the rest. “This one.”

“Okay,” Lan Fan continued. “You can keep that one but you have to get rid of the rest.”

“But—”

“ _Or_ , you can keep all of them but you can’t get any more.”

“Seems fair to me.” Ling chimed in.

“I…” Greed started. “Okay. I’ll just keep this one. But you,” he pointed at Lan Fan. “ _You_ have to throw them out. I… I can’t.”

Lan Fan frowned but walked over and began collecting the sheets anyway. “Alright.”

As she left the room she heard Ling’s voice behind her. “Thanks for the help, Lan Fan!”

“You’re welcome.” She replied, and left, thinking that would be the end of the problem.

……

Later that day Lan Fan saw Ling sitting on the couch staring out the window.

“Ling?”

“Oh! Lan Fan, I didn’t see you there. What’s up?” He smiled at her, but she knew him well enough to tell it wasn’t a real smile.

“Ling, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just…” he sighed and dropped the smile. “It feels _bad_ to get rid of things. And not just for Greed, it’s physical, like a weight in my chest.”

She sat down next to him and leaned against his shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.”

They sat there for a minute before Ling put his smile back on and stood up. “Well, it’s something we’ll both just have to get used to. C’mon, that’s enough moping around, let’s go see a movie or something, a fun one!”

She smiled back, his enthusiasm was infectious. “Alright, let’s go. We can buy you more bubblewrap on the way home.”

……

“I’ve decided I don’t like snow.” Greed said as he and Ed walked to their next classes.

“Oh come on! It’s fun! You can have snowball fights and make a snowman and—”

“I don’t c-care. It’s too d-damn cold!”

“Maybe it wouldn’t be if you would drink some hot chocolate.”

“It _burned_ me.”

“Everyone told you to let it cool down for a minute!”

“It smelled too good to wait!”

“Whatever. You _could_ wear something heavier than just that trenchcoat. I think Ling has one of those big puffy jackets somewhere.”

“That thing is h-hideous.”

“Okay, freeze your ass off then.” At that moment they arrived at the building and began stomping the snow off of their boots. Then, suddenly, Ed stopped. “I just had the best idea.”

“What?”

“I can’t tell you, just come over to my dorm after your last class.”

“Okay, fine.”

……

Ling knocked on the door to the Elric brothers’ dorm and Ed opened it. “Okay, what’s the big surprise?”

Ed threw the door to the room open and pointed to the floor. It was covered with bubblewrap, the big kind. “So I know Greed likes popping bubblewrap one bubble at a time, but has he ever tried stomping around on it?”

Greed was staring at the floor of the dorm blankly. Then he looked back up at Ed with a mischievous grin. “Oh, this is gonna be _fun_.”

And it was fun, right up until Maria had to warn them that they were about to get a noise complaint.

“Well, I guess that soundproofing spell didn’t work. So, I figured _that_ would be my Christmas present to you.” Ed said as they sat barefoot on the floor.

“It’s barely December.”

“Yeah, well, I thought of it now so I did it now.”

“That’s bullshit, you still have to get us something for Christmas.”

“Oh I’m going to get Ling something, just not you.”

“Asshole mage.”

“Demon jerk.”

Then they both laughed.

“Well, I’m going to make some hot chocolate, do you want to try it again?”

Greed paused for a moment, listening. “Ling says only if you have mini marshmallows.”

“Don’t worry, I do.”

…….

Greed should have loved the holiday season, if for nothing more than the food and the promise of receiving gifts. But more and more he found himself being excluded.

He couldn’t be in control during Ed’s dorm’s Christmas party because there were people who didn’t know about him there, he couldn’t be in control during any of Ling’s Christmas traditions because Lan Fan and Fu insisted Ling not miss out on anything, and he was pretty sure he’d be banned from Christmas dinner as well.

But he figured that by far the worst torture for him was going to be Christmas morning. He would have to just watch while everyone else received gifts and he got nothing at all from Ling’s family. And while his desire to own more stuff would be mostly sated by Ling getting gifts, he was sure it’d still leave him feeling unsatisfied and lonely. He tried to be happy that at least no one could stop him from watching the Christmas movie marathon with everyone else.

When the day came he was able to find more happiness than he’d thought, but, when the gift exchange was over and the movie marathon was being set up, that inescapable loneliness still found him. Ling left the living room and stood in the hallway so as not to bring down the mood.

_“You’re not alone. I’m here, and I care about you.”_

_“I know, but it still hurts that nobody else does.”_

_“Give them more time.”_

_“They’ve had time. Face it, kid, they’re never going to accept me.”_

Just then they heard Lan Fan clear her throat from the end of the hallway. “Um… Greed?”

“Yeah?” Greed answered.

“I, um, I got you something. I didn’t wrap it.” She took a small blue square covered in buttons out of her pocket and handed it to him. “It’s a Japanese toy meant to feel and sound the same as popping bubblewrap. I figured if I got you this you’d stop wasting money on actual bubblewrap… And… And I thought you’d want something that was like bubblewrap that you could keep.”

As she finished her sentence she suddenly found herself being hugged by Greed. After a second she returned the gesture.

Then Greed disengaged the hug and started trying out his new toy, smiling wider than Lan Fan had ever seen from him as he did. “Thank you.” He said. “Really, thank you so much.”

Lan Fan looked embarrassed. “It was no trouble at all.” She said rather defensively and walked off back into the living room.

Greed put Ling back in control as he walked back too.

_“I guess this christmas wasn’t a total bust after all.”_

Ling smiled in response and sat down on the couch. _“See, this is progress!”_

_“Yeah, maybe next year the old man will even let me have my own stocking.”_

_“It would probably help if you stopped calling him ‘old man’. But yeah, Lan Fan and Fu are finally starting to see it.”_

_“See what?”_

_“That you’re part of this family too.”_

Greed blushed deeply at this and focussed on the movie to avoid having to respond. Ling just smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, there you go! Happy holidays to you all and I hope you enjoyed this short little glimpse into the boys' post-OH MY GOD They Were Roommates lives! (In case you're wondering, yes Ling did get a gift for Greed. It was a warmer coat.)


End file.
